Thursday, January 18, 2018

Dear Daniel Craig




Dear Daniel,


Funny what a difference four days make. Ah the agony and the ecstasy. Just as January second had me down for the count I dragged my ass up off the ground and got back up on my feet again. You see, my best friend (and screenwriting and producing partner of 18 years) and I had just opened up a small press featuring 4 authors who we feel passionately about creatively.

We opened our doors January 1st. To much acclaim and fanfare. We have our editors and cover artists in place. Yes, as of January 1, 2018 3 Bitches Press is open for business. Then January 2nd I have the negative experience at the drugstore where my medication is concerned.

So I wrote the blog to raise awareness and to release the powerlessness that I felt at the situation. As much as I wanted to lay down and die I got up and started working on a new screenplay, Gemini Rising. And on January 4th I spied a pitching opportunity.

I’ve always dreamed of being a mental health advocate on a larger scale. When the opportunity presented itself to pitch a cable network development VP mine and Missy’s mental health advocacy reality tv series I went in and jumped on it.

January 6th was a crazy day. I got my hair cut and styled so that I would look great on Skype for my pitch. And then Skype wouldn’t work on their end leading me to believe I had missed the pitch altogether on my end. However, they called me and I put my best foot forward and this network executive called my project amazing and then reiterated that note by calling ME amazing.

If you’ve been in this business for any extended amount of time you know network executives just say stuff like that at all really. It was a positive experience with a positive result. I have to say the mimosas tasted especially sweet that night as we toasted this part of the process. And it made watching the Golden Globes especially fun.

Finally, just when I thought January couldn’t get better this weekend I got word that my documentary “All In the Family” that me and Missy co-produced with my cousin Rebekah about mine and Rebekah’s families struggle with the genetic nature of bipolar disorder won for Best Writing In A Documentary 3rd Quarter at the Enginuity Film Festival. Not only that but me and Missy are pitching Bounty Hunter to a well known L.A. based production company on the 26th.

January took a U-turn of the greatest kind. It’s okay to feel angry or sad. It is not a crime or your fault when your disease gets a hold of you when triggered by experiences you get caught off guard by. Or sometime when your disease has got you by the tail. But please know, there are moments like these to be had and to be joyous about on the other side of it. Getting into a one day at a time recovery is possible.

January is off to an amazing start. Here’s hoping your recovery is on an upswing and your dreams are starting to come true.


Sincerely,


Amy Leigh McCorkle

Tuesday, January 2, 2018

Dear Daniel Craig



Dear Daniel,


Life can be a funny thing. And I don’t mean a joyous laughing kind of thing. I mean a boot to the gut, kick in the teeth, ironic kind of thing. One where people on the outside looking in say gee, everyone loves you and supports you and want to be around you. When behind the scenes your juggling a million different things that pose a threat the one thing you value most of all. The one thing you cannot do without. The one thing that without none of those lovely things are possible.
For me it’s my sanity.

For me, it’s merely frustrating and irritating when a business marketing plan, has to regroup and reassess what it’s plan of action is going to be when someone with sour grapes has your account blocked on social media. Eventually I’ll be out FB Jail and we’ll be to look over our marketing plan in the interim.

No, the stuff that stops me cold is when a small group of people desperate for money and power, grab it at the expense of real live people and their healthcare.

What pray tell, you may ask does this have anything to do with me and my sanity. It has everything to do with it. You see, the current Congress and Senate (brought to you by Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell for those of you keeping score) saw fit to cram every undesirable element of the Republican platform and crammed it on to this so called tax cut bill. And our venerable (tongue very much in cheek here) president signed it.

And tonight when I went to pick up my bipolar meds on MY MEDICARE insurance I had to leave half my prescriptions behind. So tonight I am filled with an incredible amount of anxiety without any remedy to be had. I am far passed being able to calm down and creating anything at all seems to be a moot point.

You see I am on 11 medications. Most of them for bipolar disorder. I’m pretty sure politicians could give a fuck about their constituents especially the ones that voted for that tax cut. I signed every petition that came my way. I called my senators even though Rand Paul Mitch McConnell are snakes I thought I would do my civic duty.

So to those who voted these clowns into office, if you are like and are an independent artist, filmmaker, author or small business owner why the hell didn’t you call these people. This caught me off guard at a bad time, and I *KNEW* it was coming. To those of you who have helped me or ever championed me, this message is not intended for you.

My message is intended for the so called public servants in the WH, Congress and Senate who lie on daily basis who treat public service like a business (which you cannot, it just doesn’t work that way).

So I think I’m lucky. Right now, my parents are alive. Mom is a retired school teacher and Dad is a working Public Defender. They and Missy are all that stands between me, homelessness, hunger and insanity. Pray for me, pray for those like, and yes pray for those in my situation who make decisions that are not just bad for themselves but that impact others like them.


Sincerely,

Amy McCorkle

Monday, December 18, 2017

Dear Daniel Craig



Dear Daniel,


There are things I wish people understood. That I wish people knew. Some diseases simply can’t be “prayed away” while I believe in God and have a strong spiritual core I don’t believe that He gave me this disease for a reason. And conversely I don’t believe I’ve been cursed with it either by the Devil.

I believe genetics played a large part in it. Just the same I don’t think my parents are the reason I have this illness either. Sometimes that’s just the luck of the draw.

I do believe, however, that God gave me tools in order to get better. It does not, however, make it easier on me when I am stigmatized by people who don’t ‘get it’. Truth be told it makes it harder. It makes me angry. It makes me want to scream about inclusion and the message of kindness and compassion.

I wrote a faith based script about mental illness and what I believe is the answer. The truth is upsetting to some. That the answer isn’t a magic man in the sky that will simply “pray it away”. Or that meds are a panacea.

The truth is you need both of these things. Prayer, meditation, whatever your spiritual stripes go a long way to supporting meds, therapy and the support of friends and family. And when faced with stigma it can be hard not to have a knee jerk reaction.

I really try not to. Sometimes people don’t understand their actions are stigmatizing, but when shown the light they respond positively to it. I truly believe Letters to Daniel happened because the Universe knew I needed something beyond the storytelling I was doing. Not that it wasn’t fulfilling, but my soul was crying out for more. For a true purpose to my life. And what Letters to Daniel became was my answer to that. A way to reach out to others with this disease.

It can seem unfair when those around us have what feel like cruel reactions. People often shun and fear what they don’t understand. Or have pat answers to complicated situations which only serve to hurt us more.

But I know there a great deal many more people who simply do not understand and all they need is for us to put a face on it, to share our stories with them and they will come to understand I’m sure of it.

For the reasons I have explained many times before, Letters to Daniel and mental health advocacy are my purpose in life. Writing and film are my twin passions. I will be adding a podcast widget to this blogsite. The name of the podcast is Amy Unplugged and my first one is New Year’s Eve at 6PM EST. Please join me and my guests for a raw, real and frank discussion about mental illness and what it takes to survive the holidays!

Sincerely,

Amy Leigh McCorkle