I’ve always wanted to be mentored. To make contacts. To move up the ladder. That’s not why I started this blog. I started this blog as a way to heal. It was an incredibly personal thing, that just sort of took off like a shot. I know when executives are looking at numbers that maybe 9K sound like a whole lot. For someone in my shoes it is.
I wasn’t looking for followers. I wasn’t looking to sell books. Not with this blog. It just sort of grew in that direction. What started out as a place for me to come and connect with my emotional truth. Or to vent. Or basically just show what a day in the life of someone with bipolar disorder is like has suddenly become something much bigger than me.
I wanted you to know that your work was like this light at the end of a very dark tunnel. And coupled with psychiatric treatment and therapy it became a way for me to feel along the dark walls and move forward even when I didn’t feel like moving forward.
As the light became brighter I had to trust that it was better world than the sickness had to offer and that it wasn’t a train of more of the same heading towards me. Things began turn around for me in 2011. When my first book Another Way to Die was contracted by MuseItUp Publishing it was inspired in part by Casino Royale and in part by the book The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. With a hero which at least physically looked like you. The character itself was completely of my imagining and not the least bit like you given I don’t know you and only know your work.
I went on to write and contract for 25 books. 13 are of them are out. 1 is due out this summer. All since 2010. I have been fortunate to win awards. 8 Preditor and Editor awards over the span of three years. A Moondance International Film Festival Semi-Finalist for 2012 and 2013. 2013 Fright Night Film Festival Best SciFi Screenplay Award Winner for Bounty Hunter. A double finalist for 2014 Fright Night Film Festival Screenplay Competition in both SciFi and Fantasy categories. (Will find out the weekend of Fandom Fest about whether or not I am a winner in either category.)
7x Amazon Bestseller with 5 different books, including the memoir based on this blog which hit #2 twice. And was the inspiration for the documentary I hope to find distribution for. The books are Bounty Hunter #9. Gemini’s War(Gemini Rising) first time #24, second time #9. GLADIATOR (The Gladiator Chronicles) #43. BLACKOUT (An Aurora Black Novel) #15.
And now I find myself with lots of hooks in the water for distribution and a mentor after Film-Com. Life is pretty damn sweet. Next Monday I find out if one of those distribution leads plays out. And that Tuesday I find out if any of mine and Missy Goodman’s scripts win or our Letters to Daniel is selected to screen or win at Indie Gathering.
FILM-COM is only in its fifth year and is growing by leaps and bounds every year. I got in near the ground floor. I would love to go again if I have a project. And save up enough so I can stay in the Hilton. (AS IF!) When you’re living on a $766 dollar a month budget and pull off a film and a trip to a big deal thing like this is something of a small miracle and is due in no small part to donations from friends, and family. The trip and packets and banners were all done on a $512 budget. And I have to say it was well worth it.
The people I met, Erica Wester you are so going places, people who were drawn to my documentary thank you so much. All this from a blog where I used you as my silent witness. To make it okay to open up and share my journey with bipolar disorder and abuse.
And Joel, thank you for everything. You made Film-Com worth the headache of Nashville traffic as Pam and I commuted from a hotel in Franklin to Nashville everyday and got lost except for the very last day lol.
I wish one day that I get to meet you. Not as some googly-eyed goofy fan, but as someone who has a cause. To show where your work has inspired me in my work. And has inspired me in how to unlock the creativity within, to heal the scars of mental illness through use of books, movies, television, psychiatry and clinical psychology.
These things all served a part in saving my life. As your work provided the key to finally unlock all of my dreams.